WEEK 3: CYOA (Rufus, Sumire, Taako, Dorothy)

[retellers]

Comments

[uhhhmagic]

Oh— god fuckin’ dammit. Sports? Are you serious— No. Okay. Turn around. No, we’re switching with the other team. I’m not doing this one.

[too late]

[siblingless]

[Taako, please. Don't diss sports when you called dibs on Greg.

Sumire will glance behind them, but. Well. The crossroads are gone, and so are Team Rufothy. Unfortunate.]

... It doesn't look like we have a choice, Taako-san. [A pause, and she holds her hand out to him. Does he need an emotional support jock?] Um, maybe... the sooner we walk through this field, the sooner we can leave.

[uhhhmagic]

At least we don’t have to deal with Mr. Wet Blanket. [ . . . ] Dorothy’s alright though.

[He’ll look at the hand, consider it and then adjust his hair. He’s just not super good at hand holding. But he appreciates the gesture?]

Let’s get this over with.

[Foward ho!]

[siblingless]

[... A slight huff, but she doesn't look offended at all. She drops her hand, gripping the strap of her bag instead.]

Mr. Wet...? [Oh.] You mean, Wilde-san? He's not so bad once you get to know him, you know.

[Please get along.

Anyway, time to move forward! And die. Set them free.]

[retellers]

[ As they walk across the field, they'll start to hear... music?

In fact, they'll see a whole marching band--or, at least, the instruments. They seem to be playing themselves as they belt out a song.

They are so talented. ]

[uhhhmagic]

At least it’s a bop.

[Well, uh, are the instruments floating by themselves? What the heck. He’ll just. Keep on walking. This is normal.]

[siblingless]

[She keeps walking after Taako, though she watches the instruments as they move to walk past them. Realm, what the fuck inspired this?]

It's a shame we can't stick around and listen.

[retellers]

[ As they walk by the instruments, they suddenly stop playing. The sound is then replaced by a loud roar of a crowd, as stands that definitely weren't there before suddenly appear. Even more, there is an actual crowd of people--all faceless, all wearing green and yellow.

If they look down, they will also find that they are in cheerleader outfits of a similar color scheme. ]

[uhhhmagic]

[ Okay actually this turn of events is pretty amazing? Sorry, he’s into it. Shaking those pompoms for the crowd, because he had a disease where he likes to play to an audience even if this is clearly going nowhere good. Speaking of, out of the side of his mouth, while he’s grinning and doing a lil’ jump. ]

This is going nowhere good, right?

[siblingless]

[Unlike Taako, she is more visibly alarmed by this turn of events, gasping as she spins around to take a better look at her outfit. Oh, no. Oh, geez. She will switch to hold both of the pom poms in one hand, patting herself down.

Are any items they had on them upon entering gone, too?]

Definitely nowhere good. A sudden wardrobe change is never a good sign. [Not to mention, uh...] Are these people real?

[Cognitions? Creepy but harmless cognitions? Say yes, please.]

[retellers]

[ Any items are now on the ground. No pockets.

The people seem real enough. They all have faces, although they all seem a little generic? Like the type of people you'd see in some random Gap catalogue.

The sound of the band starts up again, just as a group of six other cheerleaders approach the two. They're all smiling, waving their pom poms as they approach them. A blonde speaks. ]

Goooood evening! Are you here for your tryouts? Of course you are! Yay, team!

[uhhhmagic]

Hold on— I’m gonna try something, just go with me on this one. Follow my lead and we might get an advantage on this bluff roll.

[ Just. Saying this in front of the Generic Gap People. It’s fine. They’re not worth his time, he’s clearly the superior blonde here.

Putting both his pompoms in one hand, popping a hip and flipping the end of his blonde, blonde hair. ]

No . . . ? You must be confused. We’re from the National team. They sent us to coach you.

[siblingless]

[All these white people... Wow.

Sumire was not, in fact, prepared for this bluff roll. And her head snaps around to stare at Taako like he's lost his mind.]

Huh? [TAAKO? THE WHITE PEOPLE CAN HEAR YOU?] I, um, ah... Y-Yes!

[Looking at these Generic Gap People with the saddest look on her face, like she's just so, so sorry. Focus, Sumire. You, too, can be a lying liar who lies.]

Um... It's true. Did you forget we were coming?

[retellers]

[ The group of cheerleaders start to whisper amongst themselves, before the blonde speaks again. ]

Whaaaat? Like, oh my gosh, you guys are so funny. Aren't they funny, Claire?

[ Another blonde, but of a less impressive shade, nods her head. The first one speaks again. ]

If you're on the National team, then... can you show us? It would be, like, so cool. Wouldn't that be cool, guys?

[ The crowd cheers. ]

[uhhhmagic]

No no, that’s not how this works, you see, we spectate and you show us your routine, then we tell you what’s wrong with it.

For example, your ponytail? Very low. Not inspiring a lot of pep and cheer in me.

[siblingless]

[Sweatily nodding along. Should she say something? She should say something. Oh, no. Oh, god. What's something her coach would say? Oh, boy.]

But, um... T-That's okay! There's always room for improvement. [AHHHHHH WRONG.] Now, please show us your routine!

[retellers]

[ The cheerleader pauses, her attention now directed solely on Sumire. ]

Did you just stutter? Oh my gosh, sweetie, this isn't speech therapy. We don't stutter on this field. You should go run! Some! Laps!

[ The cheerleaders all wave their pom poms in sync as they stare at Sumire and ignore Taako. ]

[uhhhmagic]

Hey—- [Shoving a pompom right in a Blonde’s face? Whichever blonde just said that.] Don’t be fucking rude!

Show us! The! Routine!

[TRYING THE SAME TACTICS BACK?]

[siblingless]

[...

Quickly lifting her bag with the toe of her shoe and grabbing it while Taako screams at a cheerleader, sure. Her anxiety.]

... We ought to come back another day. [Can they please leave.] Maybe they haven't practiced their routine yet.

[retellers]

You are failing your tryouts!

[ The crowd start to boo. They begin to throw things at them from the stands, like cans of beer, pieces of paper, concession stand food, a cat, and other random assortment of items. ]

Show us your audition. [ She looks at the other blonde. ] Lup wouldn't have done this badly.

[uhhhmagic]

[First of all, is the cat okay.

Secondly, Taako just rolls his eyes. Lup’s dex score isn’t nearly as high? Also, definitely nothing has happened to his memory recently where he may be overestimating his dex score because certain events that transpired may have been, um, forgotten. This is fine. It’s still pretty good.]

Stupid ploy, dungeon figments. That’s not how my insecurity works. [Turning to Yoshizawa though.] I think we have to do it. I tried lying.

[siblingless]

[Oh, no.]

Hey!

[First of all, stop throwing things at them!!! She side steps a few of the items being thrown at them, looking completely and utterly offended... for Taako. Not for herself. Don't boo at her friend. :///]

I'm sorry, Taako-san. It was a good attempt, though! You almost—

["—had them fooled," she wants to say, like a liar. But then she notices the cat, and runs, skips and hops to grab it midair. Are you safe kitty? You are in her arms now.

(Smash cut to the cat clawing her face off for trying to be kind to animals.)]

[retellers]

[ The cat immediately scratches her. It's fine, at least it's safe.

The cheerleaders don't respond though. They just stare at them, waiting. ]

[uhhhmagic]

Whatever. Suck on my sweet flips, dipshits.

[Fuck! Fine. Spinning on his heel to march out to the field a bit so his (I’m assuming his hairstyle changed with the outfit) ponytail might whack the Gap Model in the face.

Then he takes a breath and does a running start to an actual flip? He’s actually fucking good at this. And I rolled a 17, so I’ll say he does a fairly impressive job - though he does throw in a twerk, which is sad, because he has zero ass - and trips a little at the end, looking kinda confused. Hm. That’s weird.

Covering up his mistake by tossing the pompoms off to the side in favor of flipping the double bird at the crowd though.]

[siblingless]

[WOW. TERRIBLE CAT. She drops the cat with a startled gasp, clutching her arms where it scratched her. Thanks for nothing, cat.

Taako tried his best and she supports him, though. She will act as his hype squad while he sadly twerks, clapping to the rhythm and chanting for good measure.]

Taako-san! Taako-san! Taako-san!

[Terrible job, team.

Did you know you can still do some sick flips even while you're down an arm? The more you learn. As soon as Sumire notices him flipping the bird, she switches the pom poms to her injured arm, runs, and shows off some one-handed gymnastic flips — landing in a split. RIP to her inner leggies.

Taking one of the pom poms in her other hand and shaking them both around from her position on the ground. What is it that cheerleaders say again? What team is this, even? She has so many questions. Uh.]

... Goooooo, team...?!

[Whatever team this is!]