AUDIENCE: SORA

[retellers]

Comments

[retellers]

[ no... the reminder... they sigh ]

I can't believe they stole all the knives. Don't you guys need those? For cooking?

[reconnective]

Uh, yeah? They've been making it really hard to get anything done. And people were taking them before this even started is the craziest part. [y'all are paranoid.]

[retellers]

I know! And we can't give you more knives because they're clearly being used as weapons! So now cooking knives are banned!

[ they throw a hand up in the air in sheer agony. ]

[reconnective]

This is terrible. [y'all ruined it for everybody!!!] Can't wait until we get other stuff banned because people can't leave them alone.

[retellers]

Noooooo don't say that it's so annoying to deal with. [ they flop again, making sure to keep their mask Away from sora ] What if you guys start using spoons as weapons. Are we going to have to take away all the spoons? How are you going to eat soup!

[reconnective]

...like this. [and he mimes picking up a bowl of soup and holding it to his mouth to drink. that's it, that's his only answer.]

[retellers]

[ they dramatically bring both hands in the air near their face ]

It's like you're an animal!

[ they are clearly being very serious ]

[reconnective]

You're the one who asked. [he is so offended. clearly.]

[retellers]

[ they break character to laugh, grinning fondly at sora ]

What would you even do with all the chunks? They'd get stuck at the bottom.

[reconnective]

Use a fork. We haven't banned forks yet, have we? That counts.

[retellers]

In our hypothetical world where we've banned spoons, we've also banned forks. Because forks would go before spoons. That's why you're eating soup.

[ duh. ]

[reconnective]

Hm...how big is this hypothetical bowl? You could probably lick the chunks out of the bottom of it.

[i hate you, why are we doing this.]

[retellers]

Okay, now you really are an animal. Lick it??

[reconnective]

Well I'm not gonna pick it up with my fingers. How would that be any better?

[retellers]

What, using your fingers is way better than shoving your face in a bowl!

[reconnective]

Well, how often do you eat soup with your fingers?

[retellers]

You can drink the rest, but for the food bits, your fingers are better!

[reconnective]

Maybe we should just eat something that doesn't need utensils. Like sandwiches.

[retellers]

[ mournfully: ]

Finger food forever...

[reconnective]

Yeah...[what a bummer.] ...what kind of sandwiches do you like anyway? I'll bring some next time we hang out.

[retellers]

Hmmm. [ they seem pensive ] Any kind is fine. I don't think I have huge sandwich opinions?

[reconnective]

Peanut butter and jelly it is. [that was easy.] I'll bring a few and maybe some other stuff. You guys have to eat too still, right?

[retellers]

Yeah. [ there's a beat ] Well, I think Goat doesn't, but that's Goat.

[reconnective]

Oh. So should I bring Goat something else when I visit? I usually bring you guys food because it's easy. [except for swan who gets special friend gifts.]

[retellers]

Goat still eats? I'm not sure how to explain that whole... thing.