AUDIENCE: SOO-WON

[retellers]

Comments

[recrowns]

[hm..... soo-won looks thoughtful about that]

.... I have a theory, Goat, and I would like to propose it to you. Can you keep an eye on the nova and let me know if it might prove true?

Based on the rule that we're expecting to share our memories with one another, I believe that acting of disclosure and vulnerability is a way to bond with another person, which can lead to a rather intimate moment. Those moments themselves are memorable. So could it be that when we rely on each other, and strengthen our bonds into things that are 'worth remembering' so to speak - that generates nova?

[retellers]

Nova is attracted to strong emotions, and not only those of negative ones. So I believe that yes, strengthening bonds may assist in generating nova.

[recrowns]

[there's just a soft little laugh at that]

I see. Well... I'll hope that my efforts show their value in time.

There's a remarkable number of people here that I like very much.

[which says something since soo-won tends to like everyone]

[retellers]

That is understandable. Everyone here is kind in their own way.

[recrowns]

[soo-won nods!

yea.

this is a conversation between two people who seem to like everyone]

Have you ever disliked someone, Goat? As far as you can recall, I suppose.

[retellers]

Not as far as I can recall, though that isn't very much.

[ they think. ]

Though I don't think I'm so great of a person that I would never feel anger towards another.

[recrowns]

[he nods along]

Mm, I think that's a common enough emotion - anger. I don't think that it makes anyone feel lesser to feel it, either.

But... I think it hard - to straightforwardly dislike someone.

[retellers]

That is because you can see from others' point of view. The more you're willing to understand others and know why they do what they do... I think the harder it becomes to dislike someone, even if you don't agree with them.

[recrowns]

[soo-won nods along... humming softly]

Though I think I also see - why it is that you said that you're used to carrying sadness with you.

[retellers]

[ ???

their expression says. ]

[recrowns]

If you don't dislike anyone, it becomes harder to live - given the scarcity of resources. The way in which that you don't wish for anyone to suffer, but it often ends up becoming that way when there are scuffles for dominance.

I think.... with a lifespan like yours, and outlook like that, it probably hurts more, than if you lacked either. [a beat] Though it comes with its perks too, of course.

It's balancing, so as to not be overwhelmed.

[retellers]

[ they pause. ]

But I don't need resources?

[recrowns]

You don't -

But it sounds like you've watched others fight for them before, or something similar, if you're accustomed to bloodshed.

[retellers]

Hm. I suppose... although it's only speculation at this point.

[recrowns]

Do you want your memories back...? You'll get them back at the end, when all of this is done, won't you?

[retellers]

[ ... ]

I think a part of me is afraid... but yes. In the end, it's probably for the best that I get them back, and ideally, I should if all goes well.

[recrowns]

... afraid?

Why?

[retellers]

... Though I maintain my conviction that there are parts of me that would stay constant, with or without my memories...

[ they're quiet for a moment. ]

Perhaps part of why I can endure is because I have nothing before this to weigh me down. Whatever happens here, in the Realm, is the only life I know.

I fear that if I regain my memories, my heart will shatter, and I'll realize that I'm a weaker person than I believed.

[recrowns]

[ . . . . ah. he blinks at that, and wonders what it would be like, to suddenly suffer under the weight of countless memories all at once, so many of them difficult and full of suffering.

he reaches out for goat's hand again at that]

I don't know if I'd equate that to weakness, Goat.

[retellers]

[ ... ]

Then, what would you call it?

[recrowns]

I don't know. Emotion? Sensibility? I'd call it humanity but...

[goat isn't human, and that's all that they know.]

To feel burdened and upset isn't weakness, when it stems from a sincere kindness. Your heart isn't made of stone - you shouldn't expect it to act the same way.

[retellers]

... I suppose...

[ although there's still an uncertainty to their voice. ]

[recrowns]

Would you fault another who lived through many wars, many difficulties, and couldn't put themselves back together on their own ability? Would you call that weakness?

[retellers]

No.

[ that, they say easily. ]

... Even so, something doesn't sit quite right.

[recrowns]

.... then I won't try to convince you.

[if this is some grander thing beyond soo-won's 18 years - he thinks that he can handle many things. but it just so happens that understanding the grandeur of an immortal lifetime is not one of them]

But I'll come find you when all of this is over so you don't have to sit with your broken heart alone, alright? Don't go hiding away on me.