NPC MINGLE

[retellers]

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[ goat also nods. ] Fun stuff... fun stuff... [ it's muttered in the tone of someone who is not quite sure what "fun stuff" entails, but he wants to try...! ]

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You know... fun? [ she pauses ] Please tell me you know what fun is.

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[ there's a snort. ] He seems like he doesn't know what most things are.

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I-I know what fun is...! [ does it sound like he's sulking? he's probably sulking, a little. :T ] I'm just not sure what our participants would consider fun...

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[ swan laughs nervously, because she agrees with tiger but does not want to agree with tiger. ] Well, none of us really know what they'll like. So just... pick something you'd like to receive instead!

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Or... something that you think they might use. Practical gifts are okay as well. [ and then he gives them a rock but it's fine. ]

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[ goat is so stupid, unfortunately. ] I would suggest alcohol, but we're going to have quite a few minors...

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Oh. Right. [ wolf said, in the very obvious tone who's only plan was alcohol ] Kids like... juice, right? [ is this not what kids like. ]

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[ tiger, who is one of the few actual teenagers, looks into the camera like she is in the office ] Back in elementary school, yeah.

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Haha, I suspect Tiger-san disapproves. Soda is also an option. On the other hand, it might bubble over and spill...

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We can just warn them to be careful then. [ because at this point they do not know they will be too busy to actually there as soon as the participants arrive. it's fine. ]

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Well, drinks aside, I'm going to give them pillows. Everyone loves pillows! You can never have enough pillows. [ how is a pillow going to fit in a gift bag, swan. ]

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[ a beat. ] I can't deny that reasoning, but how are you going to fit it in the bag?

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... Okay, get this: we put the bags on the pillows! It'll be perfect! [ swan, no. ]

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[ tiger looks at the ceiling. she does not want to comment on the pillow thing. ] I'm going to be practical and give them condoms. Practice safe sex.

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[ goat opens his mouth and everyone should be very afraid. ] What is a condom?

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[ in a voice that can only be described as a terrified squeak, ] No... nothing important! We don't need to talk about that right now!! It's... it's not relevant to... the discussion...

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[ tiger waits for rabbit to finish speaking. ] You put condoms on your penis when you have sex so that you don't knock someone up.

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[ ... fox is just pressing his hand against his face. ]

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[ meanwhile, goat tilts his head. ] So it's involved with sex? But... what does it mean to "knock someone up"? [ a pause. ] Are we expecting the participants to have intercourse while they're here?

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[ she nods. ] Oh, definitely. People will always try to screw each other, both literally and figuratively, at the most badly time moments. We should invest in a hose. [ she sounds bored talking about it, at least. ]

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[ softly, with feeling: ] This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.

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What the participants do or don't do with each other is their business. We're not getting involved in that. [ :| ]

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[ will no one explain to him what "knocking someone up" means. ] I see. This seems like an inappropriate situation for it, especially as it doesn't contribute to gaining nova... but I suppose humans will do what they do.

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[ after wolf speaks, fox just mutters. ] Think it's a little too late for that... [ they're giving them condoms, they can't claim to be completely removed from the participants' sex lives now? thanks, tiger? ]