retellers: (Default)
🐐🐺🐰🦊🐯🦒 ([personal profile] retellers) wrote2020-11-22 12:57 pm

TL;CR MEME


1. Comment with your character.
2. Receive comments from others.
3. Reply to their comments with long ballads and explanations of your characters' relationship throughout the game.
4. Suffer as we have suffered over your CR.
robopriest: (aleppo)

1/2

[personal profile] robopriest 2020-11-23 01:41 am (UTC)(link)
Esta vida es mía, pero este corazon es suyo. Esta sonrisa es mia, pero la razon eres tú.

"This life is mine, but this heart is yours. This smile is mine, but the reason is you."


Basically, Alex is the most important person in this entire game, for Hansa.

Like, of course Emet-Selch is important to him, and so is Chiron, and many others who Hansa likes very much, but like he told the immortals in their "arrangement" talk, Alex is the one he would fight for, and the one he would, by no means, give up on. Even if Emet-Selch had said something like "leave her and be with me" after their ten years together, Hansa would've straight up told him no. Even after ten years, seeing Alex again made all the feelings rush back, and...I'M GETTING AHEAD OF MYSELF.

Basically, I was super excited that Alex and Hansa had CR, because like you said! Becks CR! Finally! And then the mods just turned their gun at us and put them together for affection week. "Haha", I said. "This is cute but Hansa is still a whole priest who isn't used to reciprocation for anything he says". "Oh no this is actually really, really cute" I said, like a fool. The fact is, that Hansa himself is a very carefree character. He's someone who is stated to take joy in life, and enjoy what things are offered him. He's...almost a very pure, childish character, despite the fact that he's literally a living Church weapon who is considered a "first rate murderer" for what he does to vampires and the like. So while he liked Alex from the get-go, because hey, he has an eye, he appreciates beautiful ladies - their first (and incredibly dumb) thread during affection week was really unexpected for Hansa and was really the start of actual feelings. She was...funny, and silly, and teased him right back with his teases. Hansa in his canon seems to relish teasing others and making jokes but it seems more like he does it to surprise/annoy people than expecting anything in return, so the fact that they just bickered playfully and she liked it was like. Wow. This is a woman he really likes, maybe even more than he usually likes people in general. That first week in general was a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, and when she got hurt in the CYOA and he rushed over instantly to take her, part of it was the affection effect but part of it was...him sincerely being upset that she was harmed. I think all their threads during affection week really railroaded her position in his eyes to at least someone he knew he cared for, even though he was clueless at the time as to just how deep that caring went. She asked him for self defense lessons, drank alcohol with her, and overall everything just felt so natural, even with the added hugs and forehead kisses and affection. And I think that is what was so important for Hansa, that...he could be himself around her, and she could be herself around him, and there was no suggestion of pretense between them. They were who they were, and they liked each other, and that's what matters.

And then Anna came for my life AT THE END OF WEEK 1 where Blanca actually turned around at Hansa's teasing about him and Lup to suggest that he should be "gentle" with Alex in a way that was like HM. FEELINGS HUH and it was this very thread that actually made Hansa go...."oh. OH. yeah haha I do have dokis. maybe" but he instantly waved it off because hey, maybe he did care, but he was a priest! Wouldn't work out. Sorry, Blanca. (Hansa was wrong, later.)

Week 2 was a big shock (literally!) for Hansa with the effect because he sincerely was kind of miffed that he couldn't touch her like they did before. He was aware the previous week must have been some effect, but as I said before, points above, with her, it felt natural. Him being unable to put a hand on her shoulder or ruffle her hair kind of felt like a barrier being thrown between them, and for the most part, he tried his best to make up for it by being emotionally there for her. But the icing on the cake was just being able to be a dumb jock to help her out during the CYOA, even though he honestly felt guilty that he hurt her by carrying her and shocking them both. The last thing he wanted was for her to be harmed and the fact that it was HIM who did that to her, even unintentionally was. A bit demoralizing. But she didn't carry any grudges, and didn't go against him for that, and then on top of that, she talked a little about her past that made him connect a couple of dots and get angry for her sake that she had that kind of life. I really think that at this point, he was. Sort of more than accepting he had these feelings for her but he was also just happy to shelve them and let things play out. He was a priest, and wasn't supposed to be "available", and while he knew she liked him, he didn't think she would sincerely feel more for him than that. They were friends, and that's what mattered.

And then he forgot he was a priest.

I think losing that specific memory really helped...open a big emotional door for Hansa for a lot of people. Before, he had his role, and his devotion to the Church, and even a free spirit like himself put that above all. But now, he was a free man. He could like who he wanted to like, and love who he wanted to love. But even so, he was just happy keeping the course with her because maybe she doesn't want to think about those sorts of things, especially in the middle of a murdergame and with memory loss and everything she's experienced. He...deeply respected her, so much, and his main goal with her was just to be someone she could rely on. Her happiness was his happiness. He didn't want to impose himself, either, and make himself into some kind of constant savior. If she needed him, he would be there, but if she didn't, that was fine too. Even if she rejected him, he would be upset, sure, but if it meant she would be happy for it...then it would be for the better. He really, sincerely put her emotional needs even above his own.