AUDIENCE: TAAKO

[retellers]

Comments

[uhhhmagic]

I’m only teasing, you don’t have to look that sad.

[SWAN.]

It’s cool, I mean.

[retellers]

[ sometimes you're insecure don't @ them ]

You think so?

[uhhhmagic]

Yeah? I mean, who the fuck wouldn’t want to be a Queen leading a Rebellion? Pretty sure everyone has that childhood dream.

You remember anything else? Like, what the country is like?

[retellers]

[ beams, relieved ]

It's pretty. There were these crystals everywhere, and the palace, and... Okay, so at one point there was a giant monster, but I don't think those are common.

[uhhhmagic]

I dunno, you ask my experience with giant monsters, they’re more common than you’d think.

[narf]

So that’s two things you remember. Being a queen, and, uh, the Blink spell.

[retellers]

Oh, I can do other spells, too, but I haven't needed to use that as much. Teleporting is a lot more useful.

[uhhhmagic]

Generally true. At least with a good teleport you can escape a hug at a moment’s notice, or hop the line at Fantasy Starbucks. Though I’m always a fan of a good Magic Missile for general problem solving.

[retellers]

What, you don't like hugs?

[ HOW IS THAT THE IMPORTANT PART but no they sound a little teasing. they may have noticed. ]

[uhhhmagic]

Everyone here is so . . . touchy-feely.

[Shuddering. Like it’s a horror movie.]

[retellers]

[ they nod, solemn, like they are not also touchy-feely ]

Right. So was shock week better for you? [ swan is right back to teasing ]

[uhhhmagic]

Shock week was honestly pretty great!

[ . . . ]

Apart from getting shocked all the time! And Lup was kinda bummed.

[retellers]

Just tell people you don't like physical contact. They'll listen!

[ they won't. they are a prime example ]

[uhhhmagic]

They won't! It turns me into basically fuckin' catnip for the hug-addled brains of the world. It's like a goddamn sport for you types. Magnus once broke down a bathroom door to give me a hug while I was trying to take a dump. Lup hasn't let go of my hands since we like, got here!

[retellers]

Ew...

[ they are haunted by the poop one ]

It's not like you aren't holding Lup's hand back, though.

[uhhhmagic]

Yeah, but she's the exception.

[That's different!!!!!!!!]

[retellers]

You still used her as an example!

[uhhhmagic]

I also only cast Banishment on Magnus when he attacked me in the bathroom, so I'd say overall I'm a deeply kind and wonderful person who allows this to happen despite clearly outlining my comfort levels.

[retellers]

And so modest, too. [ but also: ] What does Banishment do?

[ tell them about magic taako ]

[uhhhmagic]

Sends the target - temporarily! - to another dimensional plane. It's great for a variety of situations. Friend getting too handsy? Banished. Sister won't leave the kitchen so you can make your summer squash bonanza? Banished! Guy in a mask tells you that you're annoying? Banishment.

[retellers]

Wait, was the guy in a mask from here?

[ WHO DOES SHE HAVE TO FIGHT ]

[uhhhmagic]

[omg]

I can Banish him myself!

[He taps his chin though.]

So you're a magic user? I guess we established that.

[retellers]

I don't want to banish him! Just maybe punch him a little.

[ but yea they nod ]

Hmhmm. I don't remember any actual spell names, though.